Divorce : remedy for parents,disease for kids

I feel terribly sick when I hear about another couple getting ready to experience divorce. What happen to a child when he or she listens that soon their family would be splitting up? Sometime ago I met a 7 year old girl Ruhani (name changed).. She was just 4 year old when her parents decided that they can't live together anymore. She was very young to understand the term called Divorce.. The split of her parents’ left emotional wounds in her mind..
Her teacher, who was a good friend of her mother, told me that Ruhani was a very bubbly, intelligent and disciplined child before the divorce happened.. but now her life has been changed.. she does not make friends.. Always try to be aloof, does not join her classmates for launch..
Is it?? I was keen to talk her.. Silence of her eyes was talking to me.. But taking her in confidence and make her feel comfortable was the toughest job I have ever done..
It took me four to five visits to her school, every time I used to meet her and somehow I managed her to open her heart in front of me..
I didn’t want my parents’ divorce.. Innocently she said.. She was not looking into my eyes and was continuously staring on floor while talking to me.. I like Papa more than mamma.. I miss going with him for long drive, visiting malls, playing in garden and watching cartoon channels together..
She had no idea what made her parents to get divorced..
I tried to know why she does not be friendly with her classmates.. and the answer she gave me, were actually made me speechless.. I feel scared what if someone will ask about my father? What if other children will make fun out of my parents’ divorce?
I also asked her about her wish, desires and dreams.. She said she wants to meet her destiny maker.. Who gave her such selfish parents who only think about their inconvenience, likes and dislikes.. No one thinks about her existence. She does not want to call someone else her papa..
I could not imagine that a 7 year old kid is thinking and talking about destiny and its creator..
She even does not want to score high in the school because her father will not join her in her annual function to see her award ceremony..
She said “I liked it better when my parents were married and everyone lived together.. for me both are eaqual and important..
She had a question in her mind “why did her parents bring her in this world??
She said I will never ever get married.. because marriage makes people selfish..
Divorce could be a remedy for some couples but it’s a disease for their kids for sure.. For kids parents are like their body and soul.. and after meeting with Ruhani I felt like..
जिंदगी क्या इसी को कहते हैं
जिस्म तन्हा है और जान तन्हा
हमसफ़र कोई गर मिले भी कहीं
दोनों चलते रहे तन्हा तन्हा॥ (Meena Kumari)

If you don’t know something “LEARN”

Few years ago I joined a Delhi based television news agency.. had been appointed as a Producer for a weekly show “Khabrein Desh Bhar Se”..
Due to some unavoidable reasons my employer had to put this show on hold..and gave me another show based on Terrorism.. I got this news through my boss and trust me it actually left me in a terror like condition.. because my knowledge about terrorism was not more than any other comman citizen of India.. Had always focused more on the victims and less on the culprits in any terrorist attack. Moreover my forte was entertainment, soft and human interests stories.. I read my new agreement letter and before signing on it very furiously I mumbled “how someone can take such a drastic decision that too without my consent..

Now what to do? I asked myself.. I was between two kind of thoughts “I can do it vs I cannot do it” But the warrior, inside of me was not ready to give up.. Therefore I decided to start with the pre-production work and “phir dekha jayega jo hoga”

The first and biggest speed breaker I had to face was a herd of jealous male (senior) producers.. “ye kul paida huyi ladki kya jane Terrorism kis sher ka naam hai” and many more comments to break my confidence i heard but they made me stronger indeed..

I started reading, walking, living, breathing, and sleeping with the available data, stories about the Terrorism.. Books, internet sites, newspapers were my new friends.. and I was ready to start with the production of MY first episode.. Is there anything missing I looked back and tried to analyse my preparations.. “Oh Yes” my show needs living evidences to prove that in India its Pakistan who is supporting terrorism and providing needful infrastructure to these terrorists.. I need defence experts to talk in front of camera and share their experiences with the viewers..

I met a few senior journalists, my senior colleagues were against and opposing my efforts but my destiny was fully supporting me.. and there I met my saviour.. In our first meeting very sincerely i informed him that I am a new comer.. do not know even the ABC of terrorism.. and also about my nervousness..

"Look madam I don’t think the problem you are sharing with me is actually big or will remain with you forever".. He said very rudely.. but very soon I got to know that this is his style of making me confident.. He further added “Even I was a beginner when I started climbing on this ladder”..

“If you don’t know something then “LEARN” naa.. What is the problem, haan..

Is there any problem, I asked myself.. and my answer was Na Na..

I got all needful help from him.. made many episodes of that show.. and proved myself in front of my senior but insecure male colleagues ..

He taught me that do not pay attention on the howling mob.. stand and fight if you think you are right..